Funny wedding vows for a wife at a destination wedding

Remember when the airline lost both our suitcases and you walked down this beach path in a 'Welcome to Paradise' gift-shop t-shirt with such dignity that the officiant thought it was intentional? That's when I knew you could survive anything, including me.

I promise to always split the hotel minibar snacks with you fairly, even though we both know I will eat your half of the cashews the moment you fall asleep on vacation time.

I vow to never let you navigate using your phone when it's on 2% battery in a foreign country again, no matter how confidently you say 'it's this way.'

I promise to love you in every timezone, through every flight delay, and through every questionable seafood choice you make on vacation, because watching you regret ordering the mystery ceviche is one of my favorite love languages.

Today, in front of our very confused but delighted local witnesses, I promise to be your travel partner, your suitcase-sharer, and your personal translator even though neither of us speaks the language.

That lost-luggage t-shirt moment? I want it known for the record that I looked incredible, and you cried laughing so hard the officiant had to pause the rehearsal. I promise to always dress for main character energy, missing suitcase or not.

I promise to let you have the cashews, mostly because watching you sneak them while pretending to be asleep is the funniest performance I've ever witnessed free of charge.

I vow to keep my phone charged, or at least to accept your snack-based bribery when I inevitably get us lost anyway, because apparently that's our love language too.

I promise to always order the mystery ceviche, because regret is temporary but the story we get to tell for the next forty years is forever, and I intend to milk it.

Today, barefoot and jet-lagged and surrounded by people who have no idea why we're laughing, I promise to keep choosing this adventure, this mess, and this ridiculous, wonderful life with you.