Funny wedding vows for a spouse at a destination wedding

I promise to never again suggest we 'keep it simple' while simultaneously booking a wedding that requires our guests to have current passports and a sense of adventure. You were right. This was not simple. But look—they all came anyway.

I vow to spend the rest of our lives pretending that making everyone fly across an ocean for our wedding was a totally reasonable request, and not the elaborate scheme it actually was to ensure your uncle couldn't bring his accordion.

I promise to always be the person who says 'let's just go' when you get that look in your eye—the same look you had when you said we should get married on a beach none of us had ever seen. You make spontaneity look like wisdom, and I'm here for every impulsive, perfect idea.

I vow to be your co-pilot, your travel companion, and the person who always remembers to pack the adapters. Even when we're just going to the grocery store. Especially then.

I promise that wherever we go—and we're clearly going everywhere—you'll always have someone beside you who thinks your particular brand of chaos is the best adventure there is.

I promise to acknowledge that you showed remarkable restraint when I announced we were having a destination wedding, and you only said 'Are you sure?' eleven times instead of the forty-seven times you were probably thinking it.

I vow to never let you forget that you married someone who dragged your entire family to a foreign country and called it romance. But also, I promise to make every single day feel like we're somewhere we chose together, even when that somewhere is just our couch.

I promise to always be the person who looks at you and says 'we can figure this out'—just like you did when I was panicking about time zones and whether Aunt Linda would survive the flight. You're the calm to my beautiful disasters.

I vow to pack your favorite snacks for every trip, to navigate when you're tired, and to always, always be the one who says 'yes, let's stay one more day' when you're not ready to leave paradise. Any paradise. Even the ones with questionable plumbing.

I promise that no matter how far we travel or how lost we get—and with my sense of direction, we'll get lost—you'll always be my favorite destination, my home, my reason we keep saying 'remember when.'