Funny wedding vows for a partner at a vineyard wedding

I promise to keep loving you even though you made us do that 'romantic' grape-stomping thing on our third date, and I ruined my only nice shoes while you just stood there filming it for your mom.

I promise to always split the cheese board evenly, even though we both know you'll eat all the good stuff before I even sit down, and I'll pretend not to notice because I love you.

Remember the night we got lost between the vines looking for the car, and you insisted you knew a shortcut that led us straight into a ditch? I promise to follow you into more ditches, literal and metaphorical, for the rest of our lives.

I promise to never let you order wine based solely on the label art again, not after the 'dancing goat' incident, but I will always laugh about it with you.

So here, among the vines that have seen worse first dates than ours, I promise to keep choosing you, cheese board and all, ditch included.

I promise to never let you live down the fact that you cried, actual tears, during the grape-stomping thing while claiming it was 'just the fumes,' and I promise to keep that video forever.

I promise to always save you the good cheese, even though you say you don't mind, because we both know you absolutely do, and your face when it's gone is a whole personality.

That night in the ditch, you kept insisting the stars looked 'different from down here,' like you'd planned the whole detour on purpose. I promise to trust your terrible navigation forever, because somehow it always leads somewhere good.

I promise to keep buying wine for the label art, dancing goat included, because watching you pretend to be mad about it is one of my favorite hobbies.

So here, surrounded by vines and the ghosts of our worst decisions, I promise to keep choosing you too, ditches, goats, and all.